Today's Gentle Lessons of Life

Gentle Lessons of Life When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself. ************* A penny saved is obviously the result of a government oversight. ************* The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, But also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. ********** The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends. ********** The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a new replacement for it. ********** He who hesitates is probably doing the right thing. ********** Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are 'XL.' ********** If you think there is some good in everybody, you obviously haven't met 'everybody'. ********** If you can smile when things go wrong, you must have someone else in mind to blame. ********** The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so that he can tell when he's 'really' in trouble. ********** There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example, I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt. ********** Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs.' ********* Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it. ********* The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for. ********** Some people try to turn back their life's odometers. Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long, long way and some of the roads weren't paved. *********** When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra. *********** You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks. *********** Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. ***********